Monday, November 22, 2010

A Lesson From History


I am, among other things, a student of history.  There are scholars who assert that we shouldn't bother with learning history written by "old, dead white guys," that the history of the losers, of the "little people" is just as valuable and should be taught instead.  Hogwash! There's a good reason why the history of ancient Rome has long been studied:  it has much to teach us.  While all history must be taken with a grain of salt and there is evidence to the contrary, the rumors and stories about Augustus and Livia are particularly instructive.

Yes, that Augustus, the one called Octavius until he maneuvered himself into becoming Caesar.  He was intelligent and very politically savvy.  Why he married Livia is a mystery, but  according to ancient historians, she married him because she wanted her son to become Caesar.  (Had women been allowed to rule, she would have wanted to do so in her own right.)   And what's the best, quickest way for him to become Caesar?  Eliminate all of Augustus's presumptive heirs, have Tiberius adopted by Augustus, and then have Augustus meet a premature end.  At some point, Augustus, astute politico that he was, figured out what was up.  He also knew Livia's weapon of choice was poison.  Rather than alert her to his suspicions by having someone taste his food for him, Augustus opted to eat only figs that he personally picked off his trees.

Now, while Augustus was smart, Livia was smarter.  She came up with a very clever solution.  She coated each of the fruits on the trees with poison.  Her plan succeeded, Augustus dropped dead, and Tiberius became Caesar.

I wonder what poison Livia used?

17 comments:

Carol said...

Yes, what poison did she use? It would be helpful to know, though we know you would never actually do that in your garden. You'll figure out something else to do because you must not allow the squirrels to rule your garden!

Darla said...

Hot pepper flakes...

Helen Yoest @ Gardening With Confidence said...

Ha! What did she use, I wonder? One thing is for sure, I will be washing any fruit you pass my way.

Gail said...

B, What a 'delicious' post...The photos of your pest are really excellent! gail

Annie in Austin said...

Earlier this morning it was a surprise to see one ripe fig on our tree. It's on the counter, but now I wonder if it's safe to eat or if the squirrels read your post before I did.

Love the photo & the historical precedents, MMD!

Annie at the Transplantable Rose

fairegarden said...

Oh what a hoot, MMD! Love the bent over figure of the squirrel, even though I know he is not poisoned, it was a fine image to illustrate your story! :-)
Frances

Greensparrow said...

Haha! I love it! You and me think the same way. Ever since I read Wicked Plants, I keep thinking about how easy it would be to...

Nancy said...

Let me stand and applaud this! (Am also considering washing any fruit I get today)

Kathy said...

History does have much to teach us. Good thing the squirrels can't read.

rambleonrose said...

Ha! Tabasco seems to keep them away from my bulbs, although not quite as drastic as Livia's methods.

Lisa at Greenbow said...

Whatever it was it probably wouldn't bother the squirrels.

Plantaliscious said...

You've taken alarmingly cute photos of your intended victims...

Commonweeder said...

And people think the study of history is a waste of time. We just have to dig deeper. I just bought rat poison to put out under the hen house.

PatioPatch said...

What an unusual and enjoyable take on Roman history - wonder if the Squirrels sense a nemesis coming?

as Claudius in Robert Grave's book says: "Let all the poisons that lurk in the mud hatch out."

Laura

Jean said...

Hahaha, let me know if you find out as I have a few too many squirrels eating everything as well.

mss @ Zanthan Gardens said...

Very interesting. I remember this incident from watching "I, Claudius".

http://www.tv.com/i-claudius/poison-is-queen/episode/246269/recap.html?tag=episode_recap;recap

However, there is some doubt whether this is history or just historical fiction.

What I can't figure out about my squirrels is why do they eat the pecans from my trees when they are still green but let the pecans down the street ripen and fall to the ground, never touching them. Silly squirrels.

Lovely photographs!

Ilene said...

LOL, what a great post! I know your pain....